CHAPTER 57
Before I could remember to ask about Talon, Matthew interrupted the strange, and confused silence, “You were saying that you blamed Celeste, after I told you why she tried to kill you.”
I nodded again, “Yeah! That’s right! Why should I seek revenge on her attempting to take my life? If I did that…I might as well get the person who gave her the poison, get my grandfather who made the decision of making Gabriella leave, and also Gabriella, for putting her own mother in this predicament! Doesn’t that sound like too much work!? Wouldn’t it be better to come here? Nothing has happened to me while I’ve been here…”
It was ludicrous thinking! This la.s.s didn’t want to get revenge because…It was too much work!?
I continued then, “Instead I’d prefer to think that if Gabriella was brought up better, my mother poisoning me, would have never had happened…So, my mother only has herself the blame for her fate.”
Shaking his head, he had no idea whatsoever, on how this la.s.s’s mind worked! She didn’t think of revenge…Because of the work…And blamed the past? What does she get out of that?
…Oh…She’s thinking of the solution of the problem, before it arises. But that doesn’t help, since it’s already happened…
Honestly, it wasn’t his fault. My mind seemed to shut down any kind of revenge and anger issues and seemed to ‘store’ them up inside.
Through this, I would find a solution to any kind of issue in a basic, simple way instead. My mind came to the conclusion that if Gabriella hadn’t tried to kill me, she wouldn’t be forced out of the Rolland Estate early. Meaning, to my conclusion, it was a failure of parenting, for letting Gabriella get so totally out of control. This outcome was obviously something I couldn’t change, but since it wasn’t connected to me, due to bad parenting, I felt nothing. It wasn’t the first time I’d seen this problem, nor I dare say, would it be the last. I was still alive and…
“What happened to Celeste?”
“She was beheaded.” Matthew said, watching her.
I wasn’t surprised, using that poison would have been enough to know the answer, “Gabriella?”
“I took her under the pretence that she had some sort of disease, like her mother. I was hoping for a chance to take her and deal with her, when Talon had told me that she had schemed against you. But…There were problems, and she went missing.”
I let out a small lot of air…
She’s like one of those bad characters that you can’t kill! Haha
Matthew didn’t see much difference on my face, as he asked, “Don’t you hate Celeste?”
He really wanted to try and understand this little la.s.s. He understood Celeste and Gabriella’s…For the most part…But why isn’t this la.s.s mad?
“Not really.” I said bluntly.
Not…Really…
The man’s mind was a mess! “Why not?”
“Hate…Is strong…”
Letting out a laugh, he roughly pulled her over to him and he put his forehead against hers, “…I think you might be a little crazy, my dear.”
I was surprised, and my heart suddenly started to beat faster, but I didn’t pull away. We were still somewhat laying down, just half sitting up and when he pulled me over, I had to put a hand down to stabilize myself…
I answered him back, “I’ve been told that before.”
“Who dares!?” He asked, teasingly.
After a minute of silence, he was just about to follow his want to kiss the la.s.s…
…When I finally said, “My simple understanding of life makes me happy and life is easily enjoyed. Hate…Revenge…Makes life difficult…Who wants that!?”
I had seen many movies, seen many anime’s…Read many novels and manga…I went through a true hatred and revenge period myself…
Characters and people who think of these things, seem to not be living so much. They would be on a moving train, heading in one direction and it wouldn’t stop at any stops…
Me…I might be on the train, but I look out the window, I get out at every stop…I like to consider myself free and even make the train wait until I’m b.l.o.o.d.y ready to move on!
I guess, I wasn’t someone that didn’t want emotions to rule my life…Yet, when I’m on my ‘bad’ side, those emotions were quite forceful…It really was a predicament.
I was like, a walking, talking contradiction. Haha.
