End of the World
I just wanted to talk.

Most of the things in the box that Gu Mingxi left for Pang Qian were old.

Pang Qian sat on the floor, next to the cardboard box, pulling the items out one by one. There were a lot of comics in it. Complete sets too. About 80 percent were new, and they were all series that Pang Qian liked in junior high. At the time, she didn’t have the money to buy them. But Gu Mingxi bought them, and said that if she wanted to read them, she could just go over to his house. Now that he moved away, he just gave all the comics to her.

There was also a portable CD player, a Panasonic brand one. Pang Qian knew it was very expensive. Li Han spent almost 2000 dollars (300 USD) when she bought it. Pang Qian knew why Gu Mingxi gave her this CD player. It’s because, ever since they bought the CD player, Pang Qian was the one who used it the most.

Along with the CD player, there were also more than ten CDs of popular music. They were also the singers that Pang Qian liked. She recalled the times she went to the video store with Gu Mingxi. She would always pick up a CD and say, “Gu Mingxi, the t.i.tle track on this sounds really good! I heard it a lot on the radio.”

Gu Mingxi would reply, “Really? Then I’ll buy it to check it out.”

With thick skin, Pang Qian would say, “When you’re done, you can let me borrow it.”

And Gu Mingxi would shake his head, “Not lending it.”

“You’re so petty!”

In the end, of course he wasn’t petty.

And in the very end, all the singers and CDs Pang Qian liked, he had left them all for her.

Aside from that, there were also some small trinkets and loose things. They were all things Pang Qian had played with. When she was over at Gu Mingxi’s, she would casually mention, “It’s so cute,” or “This is really interesting, let me borrow it.” There was a charming little hour gla.s.s, a crystal apple, an anime scale figure, and a thick sketchbook.

The sketchbook was filled with Pang Qian’s favorite cartoon characters. She never knew about it, but it seemed like before Gu Mingxi drew her copies for her, he had to make sketches first. And this book was filled with those sketches.

“Really treating me as a trash bin.” Although that’s what Pang Qian said, she felt a lump in her throat. She pulled out the final item inside the box. It was a beautifully packaged box. She opened it up, and saw a ping pong paddle.

“At least there’s one new thing.” Pang Qian pulled the paddle out of the box, then waved it around a few times. The corners of her lips sprang up.

When the ping pong team was practicing, Xie Yi saw the paddle in her hand.

“Wow, when did you buy this?” Xie Yi pulled the paddle from her hands to examine it carefully. He even bounced a ball on in a few times. The original paddle was wood-colored, but there was red rubber over it.

Pang Qian didn’t understand his meaning, so she just answered, “Someone gifted it to me.”

Xie Yi said, “This paddle costs several hundred, but it’s pretty good for beginners.”

Pang Qian, whose monthly allowance was only 60 dollars, had a fright, “S-several hundred?!”

“Yeah, probably about 800. Maybe even a thousand.” Xie Yi pointed out the logo on the paddle for her to see. “Stiga, it’s a Swedish brand. It’s a bit more expensive, but it’s really good to use.”

“How can it be that expensive?” Pang Qian’s eyes grew wide. “The DHS ones I saw at the market were only 30 dollars! What’s the difference?!”

“…” Xie Yi knocked on her head. “Street stalls sell watches for 10 dollars, even 1 dollar. The mall sells ones for thousands. They can all tell the time. So you tell me, what’s the difference?”

Pang Qian answered honestly, “I really don’t see the difference.”

Xie Yi laughed crazily. “Can’t beat you with words. Make sure you practice. Don’t waste the paddle, and don’t disappoint the person who gave it to you.”

Just as he finished speaking, Pang Qian’s eyes flicked over to the side of the gym. But this time, she didn’t see that person.

That’s when she remembered that Gu Mingxi moved. After school, he would go home on his own. He didn’t have to wait for her anymore.

The place Gu Mingxi lived at now was called the New Gold Park. It was located west of E City, and the Golden Compound was located east of First High.

What that meant was that after school, Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi would walk out the school gate together. Then one would head left as the other went right, their paths never to cross again.

Pang Qian returned home that evening. She looked at her several hundred dollar paddle, completely not understanding. Pang Qian called out at her parents door and said that there was a homework problem she didn’t understand, so she wanted to call Gu Mingxi.

She hid in the living room and dialed Gu Mingxi’s home phone. Gu Guoxiang answered, and she said, “Uncle, it’s me, Pang Qian. Is Gu Mingxi there? I wanted to ask him a question.”

Gu Guoxiang was silent for awhile, then he said, “He’s here. I’ll call him to the phone. But… Qian Qian, I want to give you some advice. In the future, if there are questions you don’t understand, you can ask the teacher at school the next day. After all, Gu Mingxi doesn’t live next door anymore. Courses are getting more rigorous, so he’s also having a hard time.”

Pang Qian was still, before finally saying, “I know. I’m sorry, Uncle. Next time, I won’t. I…”

She suddenly heard an a faint sound on the other side of the phone, “Dad, is it Pang Qian?”

Pang Qian quieted. Gu Guoxiang said, “Mm.” Then she heard some sounds, like the phone was being handed over. Then Gu Mingxi’s fresh voice came on. With some delight in his tone, he said, “Pang Pang?”

“Mm, it’s me.” Pang Qian’s voice was a bit stuffy sounding.

“Is there a question you couldn’t solve? Which subject? Tell me.”

“No…” Pang Qian bit her lip, then told him the truth. Quietly, she said, “I just wanted to talk.”

“Ah?” Gu Mingxi was very surprised. Then he also lowered his voice, “What’s the matter?”

Pang Qian recalled the original reason for calling. She complained to Gu Mingxi, “Today, Xie Yi told me that the paddle you gave me is very expensive. Why did you give me such an expensive paddle? Do your parents know? If my dad finds out that I accepted such an expensive gift from you, he’ll definitely scold me.”

“That’s why you called?” Gu Mingxi spoke leisurely. “Don’t worry, they don’t know. I used my own pocket money to buy it. I don’t usually spend much money, so after a long time, I saved up a bit.”

Pang Qian still felt very unsettled about it. She said, “Also, if you’re moving house, move your stuff. Why did you leave so much stuff to me? And that CD player. Won’t your mom realize that it’s missing?”

“It’s not convenient for me to listen to music on my own when I go out.” Gu Mingxi’s voice carried a bit of laughter. “The next time we get a chance to go somewhere together, remember to bring it along. Just like we used to, we can each use one earphone.”

Pang Qian didn’t know what to say suddenly. Not hearing a response, Gu Mingxi asked, “What? You don’t like the things I gave to you? Although they’re used, but… Actually, you’re the one who used them all.”

“Nonsense!” Pang Qian cried out, upset. “Oh yeah, Gu Mingxi, I still haven’t asked! What do you mean by giving me that big English textbook and those math and science exams?!”
—-

Only bare branches remained on the London Planetree at the side of the road. Now that it was winter, a lot of people were moving in to the New Gold Park.

Pang Qian started riding her bike to and from school. When she went to get her bike the parking spot, she noticed that there were fewer and fewer bikes.

Just as before, Old Zeng, who guarded the gate, was sitting there smoking. He stood at his briquette stove cooking something. When Pang Qian returned on her bike, she greeted him, “Grandpa Zeng!”

Old Zeng just smiled and said, “Little Fattie, Mingxi left, and now you’re all on your own.”

In addition to the relocation of the company’s homes, the factory was also being relocated. The factory in City West was already being put to use. There was a lot more s.p.a.ce there, compared to the old factory. The facilities there were more advanced, and there was a new office building.

But none of that had anything to do with Pang Qian’s little family.

At Gu Guoxiang’s recommendation, Pang Shuisheng went to work at a private company. His work still involved welding things, and his salary was indeed better than before. But the workload was also a lot greater than before. He had to work overtime every few days, but he never got paid for that time.

On the other hand, Jin Ai’hua took the bus to the new factory in City West every day. She no longer worked in the finance department. Instead, she worked in the warehouse. Although the small worker’s lounge had heating, when she was in the cold and open warehouse, she could only wear layers of thick clothing.

Jin Ai’hua would always return home very late at night, and Pang Shuisheng often worked overtime. So, often when Pang Qian returned, there was no one home.

She learned how to wash rice and cook it in the rice cooker. As she got hungry, waiting for her parents to get home to make dinner, she would have a bowl of instant noodles.

When she ate her noodles, she would think about Apt. 502 next door. The apartment had already been empty for a long time. Pang Qian had asked her father what would happen to the old apartment house. Pang Shuisheng said, “It will probably be arranged for a new worker to live there. The company won’t just give up owners.h.i.+p to a company dorm/home.”

When Pang Shuisheng was laid off, he received 70 thousand dollars compensation. He used 40 thousand to buy the deed to Apt. 501, which meant it no longer had a connection to the company.

In January of the next year, the factory move was nearly complete. Only a few finis.h.i.+ng things remained to be done. They’d even stuck a seal onto the main gate. When Pang Qian rode her bike past it, she had some trouble adapting to the emptiness there. It had become so bleak and deserted.

She still remembered the image of it from when she was younger. It was such a lively place. Hundreds, nearly a thousand, workers would head in for work. The factory had a small movie theater, a bathhouse, a nursery, an auditorium, and even a small hospital.

Pang Qian was born here, she grew up here. Back then, it was like a small society had developed within the walls of the Golden Compound. This was something deeply engraved into her mind. More than ten years later, the outside world had changed rapidly. And this place had also finally become unrecognizable.

At the final exams for the previous semester, Pang Qian’s progress declined slightly. She was fifth from the bottom of the cla.s.s.

Bottom of the cla.s.s, sixth from the bottom, fifth from the bottom… She’d already grown apathetic to the situation. She’d thoroughly accepted her new ident.i.ty as an underachiever in her cla.s.s.

After the parent-teacher meeting, Pang Shuisheng came home and gave Pang Qian another scolding. “Mingxi was third in the year. Third in the year! And you? You were fifth from the bottom of your cla.s.s! There are more than 450 students in your year. You’re probably the last of the whole lot! Aren’t you ashamed?!”

Pang Qian wanted to cry, but no tears came. She really wanted to tell her dad that she’d asked around, and she would probably be around the 350 rank.

Over winter break, Pang Qian went over to Gu Mingxi’s new house to play.

She’d been over previously, when they first started decorating the house. At that time, they hadn’t moved any furniture or appliances in yet. It was just the ceiling, walls, floor, water, and electricity. Since Gu Mingxi moved near the end of the school semester, Pang Qian didn’t have a chance to visit again.

She sat alone on the swaying bus for an hour, until she arrived at the terminal. She looked around and saw that Gu Mingxi was already there waiting for her.

Pang Qian ran over to him, complaining, “Why did you come to get me? I know the way!”

Gu Mingxi just smiled. “You have to walk for more than ten minutes. I just wanted to come pick you up.”

As she and Gu Mingxi walked along the street, Pang Qian realized that the previously deserted street was now a but more lively and bustling. There were a lot of cars on the street, and a few shops had opened up. It wasn’t at all like the summer last year, not so stark as the first time Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian came here.

Gu Mingxi looked at the black plastic bag Pang Qian was carrying in her hands, and he asked curiously, “What did you bring?”

“Oh…” Pang Qian opened up the bag for him to look inside. “My dad made three braised ducks, and my grandma made a big string of sausages. My dad told me that when your dad was younger, he really liked to eat the sausages my grandma made.”

“Mm, my dad really likes them.” Gu Mingxi nodded. “But I like the braised duck more. The braised duch your dad makes is really good. And I even thought I wouldn’t be able to eat any this year.”

Pang Qian started laughing foolishly.

Gu Mingxi asked, “Is it heavy?”

“A little.” Pang Qian checked the weight in her hands, then smiled. “But with the thought of bringing you delicious food, I can carry it!”

Pang Qian followed Gu Mingxi back to his house. Because of New Year’s celebrations, both Gu Guoxiang and Li Han were home. Li Han helped take the bag from Pang Qian’s hands, and told Gu Mingxi to show her around the new house.

Without needing Li Han to say so, Pang Qian had already started inspecting around the house. The house now had furniture and appliances, not to mention people living in it, so it obviously became much warmer and filled with love. Pang Qian thought that Gu Mingxi’s house really looked nice. It was s.p.a.cious and bright, and there was a light, lingering scent of paint.

She took special notice of the south facing room next to the master bedroom, and found that it had been turned into a temporary storage room. Aside from some cardboard boxes and some old furniture, there wasn’t really anything there.

After they finished looking around, Gu Mingxi brought Pang Qian to the kitchen where Li Han was preparing lunch. Gu Mingxi asked, “Mom, what’s for lunch?”

Li Han, “Sliced blackfish, braised beef, corn and chicken soup, and vegetables.”

“Awesome!” Pang Qian said. “It’s been a long time since I’ve eaten Auntie’s cooking! I love Auntie’s chicken soup!”

“It’s a recipe from my hometown.” Li Han hadn’t seen Pang Qian in a long time, so said with a big smile, “Qian Qian, what do you think of Mingxi’s new house?”

“It’s so pretty!” Pang Qian said sincerely. She looked around once more and said, “But there seems to be a room that hasn’t been set up.”

“Oh… Yes.” Li Han’s expression became a bit awkward. Then she told Gu Mingxi, “Aiya, the two of you, don’t play in the kitchen. Mingxi, take Pang Qian to the living room to watch TV.”

Pang Qian followed Gu Mingxi to the living room, and there was Gu Guoxiang. He sat on the sofa, watching TV with a sour face. From the moment Pang Qian entered the room, he continued to sit there. Even when she called out a greeting, he only nodded his head towards her.

Seeing Gu Guoxiang looking like that, Pang Qian felt a bit frightened. She pulled at Gu Mingxi’s sleeve. “Gu Mingxi.”

“Mm?” Gu Mingti turned to her.

In a small voice, Pang Qian said, “Let’s go to your room.”

Of course Gu Mingxi had seen Gu Guoxiang’s att.i.tude. Feeling a bit upset inside, he just nodded, “Okay.”

His room faced north, and outside his window was the street. But since their house was high up and there weren’t that many cars on the street, with the windows closed, there wasn’t any noise drifting in.

Pang Qian looked around Gu Mingxi’s new room. She looked and touched things with interest. His room was very clean, colored with deep blue and the original color of wood. His bookshelf was set up, and it was convenient for him to take and put away things.

Gu Mingxi sat on his bed and asked, “Pang Pang, you didn’t discover that there’s something new in my room?”

“Something new?” Pang Qian looked around again, and finally saw that there was a short desk in the corner. And on top of the desk was a computer.

“A computer!” Pang Qian cried out. “When did you get a computer?!”

“After final exams.” Gu Mingxi walked over to Pang Qian’s side, then lifted his foot to the keyboard. He said, “I don’t type slow anymore. More than 70 characters a minute.”

“That’s amazing!”

Pang Qian’s only knowledge of computers was from her weekly computer cla.s.s at school. She’d never gone online, and she didn’t really know what the internet was. Gu Mingxi turned on the computer, and demonstrated how to go online to read the news, how to join a chat room. He even taught her how to play Minesweeper.

His toes moved across the keyboard expertly, and occasionally he would move the mouse. Pang Qian was dazzled by it all, and couldn’t stop herself from clamoring up, telling Gu Mingxi to let her play.

But after playing a bit, she lost interest. Gu Mingxi’s computer desk was too low, so bending over to use it was too difficult.

Gu Mingxi felt a bit bad about it and said, “There are snacks and drinks in the cabinet. They’re things you like, so you can get it yourself.”

Pang Qian chose a bag of potato chips, and opened the bag with a kacha kacha. She looked at the posted on he back of Gu Mingxi’s door and asked, “Who’s that?”

“Hao Haidong,” Gu Mingxi said. “China’s best forward (football/soccer).”

“Don’t know him.”

Gu Mingxi laughed in spite of himself, “Who do you know?”

“…” Pang Qian thought carefully. “I don’t know anyone.”

“Yeah, exactly.”

The two of them were silent for awhile, then Pang Qian asked, “Have you read any comics recently?”

“No, you?”

“Me neither.”

Gu Mingxi, “I haven’t read comics in a long time.”

“Me too.”

After five sentences, they went silent again. For some reason, a sour, aching feeling crossed Pang Qian’s heart. Although Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian were still deskmates, they hadn’t seen each other in more than ten days, since the final exams. In this moment, it seemed that, aside from studying, the two of them didn’t have a common topic to talk about.

It wasn’t like that before. In the past, there was nothing they couldn’t talk about. They were nearly inseparable, from the moment they left for school until they left in the evening. Then Pang Qian would also go over to his house to do homework. They spent more than ten hours a day together, but they always had something else to talk about.

Gu Mingxi went back to the computer, and pulled out some disks from the drawer. He asked Pang Qian, “Do you want to watch a movie?”

“Sure.”

“What do you want to watch?”

“Whatever.”

He picked a disk and put it into the CD-ROM. It was a Hollywood blockbuster, “Gladiator.” Gu Mingxi had watched it already. But, although Pang Qian had never seen it, this type of b.l.o.o.d.y movie full of killing wasn’t something she was interested in. And so, the two of them sat there, both rather uninterested.

Just then, a shrill scream sounded from outside the room. It sounded like a gla.s.s or ceramic dish had broken on the ground.

That sound was especially catching. It wasn’t like someone had dropped a dish, but rather, like someone had thrown the dish onto the ground.

Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi were both very startled, their eyes suddenly meeting. Pang Qian hadn’t even started speaking yet, when they hear another crash. And then a third time, the sound of breaking dishware came.

That sound kept ringing in your ears. Pang Qian was stunned, in a daze. She looked over to Gu Mingxi. Then Li Han’s voice suddenly cried out, “Gu Guoxiang! If you dare walk out that door today…! Don’t come back again!”

Gu Guoxiang didn’t respond to anything, but his voice (?) could be heard slightly mixed in with the sound of Li Han’s curses.

Then Gu Guoxiang finally called out, “Are you done?!”

“Ah—” Li Han started crying. It was a piercing cry that made Pang Qian’s heart jump up. She and Gu Mingxi sat there stiffly, as they heard Li Han calling out her accusations against Gu Guoxiang.

At her second sentence, Pang Qian quickly stood up. She stood in front of Gu Mingxi, and without hesitation, she covered Gu Mingxi’s ears.

The youth sat in front of Pang Qian, his face pale. His whole body was taut, as he shook greatly. Even his empty s.h.i.+rt sleeves started swaying.

Pang Qian put all her efforts into covering his ears. She knew she must have been hurting him, but she didn’t care. She just didn’t want him to hear a single word that Li Han said, or any of Gu Guoxiang’s responses to his wife.

Gu Mingxi just stared at her the whole time. A deep confusion was carved into his clear eyes. Pang Qian looked down at him bravely, even smiling at him.

It was cold. Gu Mingxi’s ears were covered by Pang Qian’s cold hands. He could hear a buzzing in his ears. He heard his mother’s voice, and occasionally, he’d hear his father’s voice. But he couldn’t hear the words they said clearly.

Those hurtful and vicious words entered Pang Qian’s ears, one at a time. She was deathly afraid, as if it were the end of the world. But towards Gu Mingxi, she kept smiling.

Gradually, the world grew peaceful again. Gu Mingxi’s panicked expression left his face. His body relaxed. In the end, he even closed his eyes.

And like that, Pang Qian pressed her fingers to his ears, until all the sounds from outside the room disappeared.